An Open Letter...

Dear self-absorbed jack-ass,

Let me begin by saying that I do not believe myself to be one of those people who thinks that others owe them something. I'm a pretty hard worker and I try to be fair and courteous when I can. That's why, when I am looking for a place to park my car, and I see your GIANT luxury SUV (for all that all-terrain, city driving you do) parked carelessly in one-and-a-half parking spaces - well, it makes me irate. Ditto, to you, the tiny sports car driver, whose car is so important, that you must park DIAGONALLY in two spots, just to make sure that none of us commoners park too closely to you.

While I'm at it, perhaps I'll address the, almost certainly senior citizen, who parks his ancient Lincoln Continental, TWO INCHES from my car, thereby making it impossible to open the door far enough to get myself out, never mind extract my kid from her car seat - thanks for taking notice!

In addition, all you able-bodied people, who walk with your heads...well, down, if not up your arse, who feel that the ramps provided for those who travel with wheels (i.e. wheelchairs, walkers, and yes, strollers) are there for your convenience, and will not step out of the way if one of those slower-moving people happens to need them as well - F- you! You are an assh*le. I know it's not always obvious when a person has need of those ramps, but more often than not, it is the handicapped and elderly that make way for the jerks who are using them, so it's not hard to tell who has manners and who thinks they are more important than everyone else.

I suppose if you're in such a rush that you can't use the stairs, then you're probably too busy to stop and hold a door open for somebody who could use an extra hand as well. I'm sure we all understand.

But just so you understand - YOU ARE A PRICK. May Karma do it's worst to you...after all, you've earned it.

As The Sands Of The Hourglass....

When I was a student teacher doing my practicum, my professor came to observe and evaluate my teaching. Afterward, we sat down and discussed what he'd seen and it was at that time that I got what I considered the very best professional compliment I could get from a colleague. He said, and I'm paraphrasing here, that my love of teaching was obvious and that it seemed to him that I would gladly do it, even some of the time, for free.

During my career so far, there have indeed been times when I felt like I would do the job for free. Not every day, but some. I have been lucky to find my calling and a job which provides me with joy, pride and purpose.

But today the Chimp is one year old, and as the clock winds down on my time at home with her, I feel very strongly that, when I go back to work on the 30th, it will largely be for the money. Because I don't need my job for joy, pride or purpose anymore - the Chimp gives me all of those things and more.

I am crushed that I won't be able to spend the day with her anymore. I am sad that I will likely miss many of the next milestones for her and that when I do get home from work that our time together will be marred by the stress I feel over my job.

I am nervous, also, that my work will simply not seem as important to me as it once did, and that I won't be able to live up to the standards that I ( and my co-workers ) have come to expect from myself. I would be very disappointed indeed to find that I am no longer worthy of my job.

But in the mean time, while I psych myself out, the Chimp is chugging along. She is hilariously expressive - I've never seen a 1 year old with so much eyebrow movement! Although she has only a handful of words, she is remarkably effective at communicating her needs and feelings. As luck would have it, she is a very happy baby. She loves "reading" her books and will hold one out for me to read for quite a bit longer than it would have taken her to bring over to me, but the mountain must always come to Mohammad - she refuses to budge. Unless she is coming over to maul me. She likes to pinch and poke - delighting in my reactions, comparing them to her father's. He is, of course, wrapped around her finger.


In short, she's perfect and I am so thrilled that she is mine. I can't believe that a whole year has passed. For as much as she's changed, I'm sure I've stayed the same - except that now, she's the centre of my universe. What a change is coming for both of us, so very soon.