Um Yeah, Thanks Brooke

So I'll admit, I like to watch reality television. Survivor, America's Next Top Model, So You Think You Can Dance - I watch 'em all. This week, the Hubby and I sat down to watch the latest season of Dancing With The Stars. It's innocuous enough. Nobody gets hurt and it's fun to watch the beautiful people trying to do something that they wouldn't normally do on live television. But I have to say the needle went screeching off the record for me when I saw Brooke Burke in her barely there costume looking like she's never eaten a trans fat in her whole life.

The woman has four (count 'em, 4) children, the most recent of which was delivered only 6 months ago!


Now, I don't normally like to compare myself to the people on T.V. (unless of course they are the extremely obese people on The Biggest Loser), but in light of the fact that Brooke has recently delivered a baby and so have I - I admit the temptation was too great to resist. I definitely do not look like that!

So I told myself all of the things that other women in my position would tell themselves - that Brooke Burke makes a living out of looking like that - her livelihood depends on it. That she likely can afford to pay someone to make her meals for her and does not eat PB&J or frozen chicken nuggets for lunch like her kids do because she doesn't have to make lunches and keep her house in order like other moms do. That likely she has a personal trainer to make sure that she keeps that absolutely rock solid body at all times.

But it might not all be true. More likely, the woman looks like that because she doesn't sit on her couch eating cookies after her 4 kids go to bed. She probably hasn't ever knowingly consumed a trans fat, because she probably is on some raw food diet, and probably she doesn't collapse on her couch in grateful exhaustion when the last of her kids goes down for her nap - she probably does Pilates or yoga or something.

And good for her. Even if she does hire out the cooking duties, or has a live in nanny, or just enjoys good clean living - I don't begrudge her her hot body. But maybe she could just keep her four kids to herself. Other people don't need to know that it's possible to look like that six months after giving birth. I know I didn't!


But Brooke isn't just out there showing off. No, she's got a website dedicated to helping other moms out. Yeah, go ahead, check it out. But here's the thing. I'm not entirely convinced that the band of elasticized fabric that Brooke is flogging on her website is actually responsible for her taught tummy -- sorry Brooke. Would it stop me from trying it next time around? No, I'd try a lot of things to look like her.

Except walk past the concession stand at the movies without picking up a bag of popcorn and some Milk Duds. But, thanks anyway Brooke.